I guess you must have heard the phrase “if you’ve got it, flaunt it” implying that if have got an asset worthy of praise then reveal it for all to see. On that note, it might be rewritten as “if you’ve got it, bare it”. This is the case in the fashion world where ladies have to bare (expose) significant parts of their body. Most significant are ladies with large upper case – breast (pardon my plainness), have to bare a significant amount of it for the world to see (“admire”). I presume it is a fashion rule as I hear and see on fashion programmes and make-overs that you must show some part of your body area that are assets while you hide/ cover up the uninteresting ones (cleavages, tummy, legs, back etc). The most irritating to me is the show of the bum line when ladies wear pants designed to reach half of their bum instead of the waist. The most accepted is the exposure of the cleavages which is done irrespective of the size of the breasts.
It seems the show has been taken to another level, one that becomes an open challenge to find out whose breasts are bigger. Some time ago, the challenge was between Cossy Ojiakor and Gloria Doyle as it became a regular gist among the Nigeria’s print media pages. Another challenger has just arrived on the block according to a publication in Saturday Sun newspaper –
Breast war
For years, Actress Cossy Ojiakor has been showing off her intimidating breasts, which she said are her “assets.” But it seems her reign is about ending. Now, she has a challenger in Sharon Promise Edobor| Read Story
My little way to resolve this is that they bear it all on a TV show and make all the men and women be the judge through sms and phone calls – not from little exposures and words of mouth.
I wonder what the war and all these exposures are supposed to achieve if not silly cheap popularity, a lure of sexual attraction, intimidation, fornication, undue pressure that could spark off from either end, evil reactions from rape to riot, and the likes. I believe all these are just shows of shame and insecurity in personal development and intelligence that looks for ways to patronise people (especially men) with their feminine endowments as a means to an end. Some ladies have told me their intention is far from this when they pick such clothes, they just pick the clothes for other reasons like texture, fitting, colour etc. They totally have no intention to expose. While, I might agree to that I have a problem with it because as important as those other reasons are to picking the clothing should the reason of exposure be considered. A reality every lady must know is that while you were not planning to have something “indecent” worn, the designer of the clothe had your figure in mind and how it will attract and lure any beholder to be energised towards you – for “good or bad”.
The breasts are natural gifts from God which is given for two major purposes which are for the benefit of the child - Psa22v9, and for the husband to enjoy - Pro5v19. They should be cherished, protected and preserved to meet these two major purposes and not to be flaunted for all to see. Every woman should carry and present herself as a cherished possession. One who was carefully packaged and endowed from God. The same way you do not treat a diamond pearl or a gold necklace or chain as common then the woman and all are cherished assets (including the breasts) should be cherished and reserved for the purpose it should serve.
I have not said that you should not dress smart, incoherent or uncoordinated but dress descent, smart, tact and attractive. Your dressing should attract people and command respect. An attraction that says you are thick, smart, priceless and purposeful not an attraction that says you are available at a cost, “you can have a piece of me” or try me o! Just be descent and comfortable too. I will like to end along the lines of scriptures below-
1Pe 3:3 Of whom let not be the adorning of garments, or outward braiding of hair and wearing of gold, or of putting on clothing,
1Pe 3:4 but let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, the meek and quiet spirit, which is of great price in the sight of God.
Col 3:17 And everything, whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by Him.
Be good and pay attention more on the inner beauty which is a very costly price before God and be thankful to God as you do all you do (including your dressing up/down) in the name of God. Just before you step out while checking the mirror, do be sincere with your decency in dressing also.
Saturday 20 August 2011
Sex Craze!!!
I attended a wedding ceremony in one of the states of the south – west of Nigeria. The experience or reality I discovered was embarrassing to me as a youth and challenging as a Christian. We arrived there a day before the wedding day so that we could start early the next day and get it all done with in no time.
On arrival to where some guys lodged (an hotel) was the flow of drinks (alcohol) and cigarettes. I refused the offer to take something alcoholic but stuck to the choice of a malt drink. It was bottle after bottle as it may not be considered strange – “boys life” right? To me it was out of place but it was not a shock in any way.
The shocker of the night was when young girls from the campus within the town were organised to be around for selection by the guys at an arranged/agreed price for the night. Notable and painful to me were two girls that really appeared naive. So many questions ran through my mind as I waited in observation of the fusion of this discovery to me (but the guys confidently spoke like it was common practice everywhere- this was to be confirmed via a phone call to another girl who can be arranged from the next campus town). The girls escaped being prey that night or may be a loss of business because of some misunderstanding. Guys felt bitter and disappointed in a night that had been pre-arranged in their thoughts. I felt a relief though but I was still uncomfortable with the environment/atmosphere.
Just before I left the environment, I was opportune to hear of a bargain between another young girl that was hanging around for a prospective “dealer” and a man. The young lady (girl) was asking was demanding for N5,000 while the man offered N2,000 only for the night. An agreement to this meant an overnight arrangement and she would have to invite other girls for the remaining guys at the agreed price. I’m wondering how many guys she would have slept with before she gets married?!?!
No matter how we look at this case, it is a sorry situation for our youths and the future of our generation. It is a drop in the moral standard of our generation in which sex is just a – fling, game, fun or exchange! Can you imagine the risk of STIs (especially HIV) that tends to spread? The excuse is that you can protect yourself- condoms. Does this imply that condoms aid immorality? It’s a pathetic situation and my wonder has been how this can be stopped or reduced. What do you really think? How are these young girls exposed or introduced to such immoralities? Can parents do anything to curb this situation that they are probably unaware of? Maybe it was a case of underage sex by one “uncle” that triggered the animal side of these girls or a true lack of funds from home? Do we organise a crusade to keep everywhere clean or ask university authorities to monitor undergraduates like secondary school students?
I know you can be of help from this point with more thoughtful questions and lines of solution which may include situations and people to blame about this. I think everyone should choose to go the responsible way and make the choices that will present us as honourable women and men (ladies and gentlemen). Actions that needs no defence or cover in future, such that will keep our heads held high and not with deflated minds.
Difficult as it may appear for someone who has an excuse to engage in these things or another that sees no moral wrong in it, there appears to be a common phase in the process – it is done in secret! This makes it wrong. Then why is it done anyway? Whatever the cause is, we can stop it. How? It begins with you. My suggestions are as follows:
Firstly, if you are not involved in such a practice (casual sex, flings, fornication etc), do not get into it. Stay clear from it in every way possible. The way to do it is to RUN from every appearance of evil. Once you start it, you don’t want to stop. It is addictive. Make up your mind to abstain till you are married. IT IS POSSIBLE!!!
Secondly, if you know or suspect someone who is actively or passively involved in it, then you need to try to help the person. You could start by praying for such a person (prayer will go a long way), then have a talk with him/her about the risks involved (s/he might be aware of them already but adopting a caring and not castigating approach might be the way in). Then offer whatever sincere help you can offer while you remain discrete about your discussions.
Thirdly, if you are the person in question and you want to stop but you honestly do not know how, you would have to talk with someone respectable about it. Such a person must be willing to help and counsel you through a process to break out of this mess. A truth you must remember is that you can if you decide to. It will not stop by wishing it away but it will require a conscious commitment with support. Go ahead.
On arrival to where some guys lodged (an hotel) was the flow of drinks (alcohol) and cigarettes. I refused the offer to take something alcoholic but stuck to the choice of a malt drink. It was bottle after bottle as it may not be considered strange – “boys life” right? To me it was out of place but it was not a shock in any way.
The shocker of the night was when young girls from the campus within the town were organised to be around for selection by the guys at an arranged/agreed price for the night. Notable and painful to me were two girls that really appeared naive. So many questions ran through my mind as I waited in observation of the fusion of this discovery to me (but the guys confidently spoke like it was common practice everywhere- this was to be confirmed via a phone call to another girl who can be arranged from the next campus town). The girls escaped being prey that night or may be a loss of business because of some misunderstanding. Guys felt bitter and disappointed in a night that had been pre-arranged in their thoughts. I felt a relief though but I was still uncomfortable with the environment/atmosphere.
Just before I left the environment, I was opportune to hear of a bargain between another young girl that was hanging around for a prospective “dealer” and a man. The young lady (girl) was asking was demanding for N5,000 while the man offered N2,000 only for the night. An agreement to this meant an overnight arrangement and she would have to invite other girls for the remaining guys at the agreed price. I’m wondering how many guys she would have slept with before she gets married?!?!
No matter how we look at this case, it is a sorry situation for our youths and the future of our generation. It is a drop in the moral standard of our generation in which sex is just a – fling, game, fun or exchange! Can you imagine the risk of STIs (especially HIV) that tends to spread? The excuse is that you can protect yourself- condoms. Does this imply that condoms aid immorality? It’s a pathetic situation and my wonder has been how this can be stopped or reduced. What do you really think? How are these young girls exposed or introduced to such immoralities? Can parents do anything to curb this situation that they are probably unaware of? Maybe it was a case of underage sex by one “uncle” that triggered the animal side of these girls or a true lack of funds from home? Do we organise a crusade to keep everywhere clean or ask university authorities to monitor undergraduates like secondary school students?
I know you can be of help from this point with more thoughtful questions and lines of solution which may include situations and people to blame about this. I think everyone should choose to go the responsible way and make the choices that will present us as honourable women and men (ladies and gentlemen). Actions that needs no defence or cover in future, such that will keep our heads held high and not with deflated minds.
Difficult as it may appear for someone who has an excuse to engage in these things or another that sees no moral wrong in it, there appears to be a common phase in the process – it is done in secret! This makes it wrong. Then why is it done anyway? Whatever the cause is, we can stop it. How? It begins with you. My suggestions are as follows:
Firstly, if you are not involved in such a practice (casual sex, flings, fornication etc), do not get into it. Stay clear from it in every way possible. The way to do it is to RUN from every appearance of evil. Once you start it, you don’t want to stop. It is addictive. Make up your mind to abstain till you are married. IT IS POSSIBLE!!!
Secondly, if you know or suspect someone who is actively or passively involved in it, then you need to try to help the person. You could start by praying for such a person (prayer will go a long way), then have a talk with him/her about the risks involved (s/he might be aware of them already but adopting a caring and not castigating approach might be the way in). Then offer whatever sincere help you can offer while you remain discrete about your discussions.
Thirdly, if you are the person in question and you want to stop but you honestly do not know how, you would have to talk with someone respectable about it. Such a person must be willing to help and counsel you through a process to break out of this mess. A truth you must remember is that you can if you decide to. It will not stop by wishing it away but it will require a conscious commitment with support. Go ahead.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)